You're Out

At the end of the week it was time to move Dad. I came at his regular pickup time in the morning. 

I was happy to see he was napping. This gave me time to quietly pack up all his clothes in the rolling suitcases I had brought. 

As I was leaving to take the suitcases to my car, I found the tour guide and two prospects in the hall hoping to look at the room. I asked them to give us ten minutes because Dad was still asleep. 

I returned to the room after stashing the suitcases in my trunk and brought him out as if we were going to visit mom. 

Once again I took him back to mom's room and left him. I returned to the offices and did his paperwork and then got his clothes and unpacked for him. Once done, I took a deep breath and returned to mom's room. 

I can't remember the full sequence of events, but I think she had been taken down to lunch and Dad was to eat with her. Instead I found them both back in her room and my Dad telling me she had not wanted to eat. I accepted this without arguing, but I knew mom well enough to know this was not the full story. She liked to eat. 

I asked if he would like to come see where he was to stay. On the way down, he was angry and not happy about mom's room and him staying. He didn't have anything other than the darkness on that front. 

Once in his room we sat on his bed. He looked around and told me this room was much better. But he had made a friend at the Garden and he didn't know he was moving. He was upset. 

I told him I was sorry to hear the part about the friend. That was indeed sad. I hoped he'd find someone to talk to at this new place. 

Now let me admit, I did not strictly follow my previously learned rules of engagement. I had in fact a bit of a "come to Jesus" moment with my dad. I didn't get angry with him, but I did go over my thinking fairly assertively. 

First there was the cost, and for the first time since he wrote those checks to the Garden, I told him dollar amounts. I knew the idea of saving $2000 would appeal to his sensible money saving core. 

But I also told him how angry I was at the Garden for not taking mom back. I didn't want him to continue there and keep paying them.

Further while he had lost a friend, he had the opportunity once again to be with his wife. I hoped that was an offset. 

I am so thankful to be able to say this is the last time I heard any disputing over living conditions.